Remembering Names, Restoring Honour

I was very honoured to walk with the survivors at the “Lost but not Forgotten” Memorial at the Huronia Regional Centre cemetery in May this year.

The story of the graveyard mirrors the story of abuse and exclusion that surrounds the institution. People disappeared, were buried without names, and their burial ground has been desecrated by sewage pipes.

In recent years, survivors and allies have organized, researched and advocated with government to reclaim and restore the cemetery. Much has been acheived and there is much more to do.

We gathered at the bottom of the road. The day was grey and wet and cold. Survivors assembled with signs of loss–a homemade casket, a hand-sewn banner, baskets of comforting things that had been denied, photos of relatives. We carried them up the hill, together, walking behind the pipers.

As I listened to the pipes I was reminded of the recent funeral of my brother where we also processed behind a piper. It was full of honour and dignity as his colleagues paid their respects. This procession looked pretty different, but embodied the same claim of dignity, honour and respect. By the time we reached the gate, I felt like we were setting something right with our simple solemn walk of honour.

We gathered in a circle to honour the dead, at at the same time it was an honouring of the living as the survivors expressed not only their grief, but also their outrage at what has happened to their families and friends.   I witnessed stories of cruelty and harm and unthinkable loss.  At the same time, people made all kinds of creative offerings and the circle filled with care.

I decided to bring little bundles of lavender, an ancient herb used in honouring and washing the dead. Every body deserves an honourable rite at the end of their life.  In a small way I hoped we could  restore some goodness by offering a symbolic act of honouring.  Some of us sprinkled the lavender over the graves.  I appreciated the way it lingered on my hands, marking my own body with the memory of those who died. I hope I can carry their memory with honour.

Death is not the end of love and those who lie in the Huronia cemetery, known and unknown, continue to be loved and remembered. Survivors continue to resist, to bear witness to their own truth and to compell the wider community to Remember Every Name.

The community conversation for Remember Every Name is on Facebook, where you can ask to join the group.